Adventures in Alishan pt. III

The next day I Decided to Go

Further down the mountain to a village below

And I Found my Way to Another Place to stay

It was run by a Catholic nun

And if I was wearing a Rangers top

I doubt She would've Called Me a Hun

Not Understanding Our Secretarian Fun

Because she was Taiwanese

And she chatted to Me very pleased

As I could speak to her In Chinese

There was just One other guest In The Whole place

So I had a nice big dorm room to my Self, lot's of Space

I dumped my stuff and started up a race

Away I go up a Cliff face!

Actually It was a bamboo forest Track

And this is where I was heinously attacked!

A creature That Appeared as a dog pup

But his Energy Field said, "I DO NOT HUG"

And Listen, not even One pinky finger did I use to Touch

HE was The One that Started It up!

As I made my Way towards the track steps

He came Crashing towards me like a T-Rex

Acting All hard like He had muscles to flex

"Ach Awey ye get - Get!"

Frustrated I said

As I Pondered what to do next

While he clamped his daft teeth around my leg

And then the Mother was there too

And I thought shit what to do?

She was Giving me a kind of look

Saying "go Now, and I'll let You off the hook..."

Oh I'm sorry, I must have mistook

This leg of mine for a chew toy

Can You not control yer boy!?

Oh but she wisny Happy

So I started marching, making my Self snappy

And the wee eejit, aye he did Fall away

But my pride took a Right Good knocking that Day

So off I went as I thrashed Through bamboo

After a while I Stopped...is this The Way through?

Turns Out there'd been a typhoon

So that's why This place was a Mess

It wasn't a track but a place of tree Death

So Now I'll have to Go back...

But what if that vicious wee puppy attacks?

Well I shall simply Move On like a soldier on a march

And hopefully that puppy will Have grown a Heart

And Learned how not to try and rip legs apart

Very Good, so off I go

Is the puppy there? No

And Here we have the track That Is the track

Not like that faker Behind My Back

And so without any Blood Spillage

I began a seven mile Walk to some random village 

And I must say It Was a Beauty to behold

Nice warm Sunshine, no cold

I'd Recovered from my attack and was Again bold

And as The sunLight Filtered Through the trees

The wind Accompanied It with a Light breeze

And The Scent of the day was One of pines

And The Chattering Fell Away from my Mind

And though I seemed One Human alone

I Felt like The Whole Universe out for a roam 

After a while perhaps six and a half miles

I came to a green Field So lush

And Felt a Steady Peaceful hush

Nothing Going on In The Realm of the Mental

Just a Softness that Felt so Gentle

And I Felt Filled with Elation

Within This Glorious Isolation

As I Continued to make my Way

To a Waterfall that may

Have Existed

According to a Sign on which it was listed

But then maybe I Missed It

And I Ended up In a shop instead

And Endless tea labels I read

But I was rather hoping to Be fed

And so I Asked for a snack

And the shop lady said, there's none of That

Oh well Okay

Well there's some food We were Going to throw away...?

Ach naw yer awrite hen

That's me away Again

And I Began the seven mile Walk Reversed 

Feeling somewhat terse

Because my leg It had an Ache

And was it the deathly puppy bite You might say?

Well no

It was just that I had been Walking sooooooo

Much

And like a rabbit I Must Return to my hutch

Back at my room I had a Long Nap

As That Night I'd go back

To Another mountain Peak 

As another sunrise Surprise I did Seek

4AM Here We Go Again

Out I Go and under The Stars 

I set out but hadn't got Far

When my wee leg said Let's Go back

And I said naw man, I've a Mountain to crack

And maybe I should've Listened to that leg

Cause after All It had said

I'm not really up for This

But my wee daft Mind said pshhhht

And on I Go

Following my torchly Glow

Through a Forest of Pitch Black trees

What Kinds? 

Well I couldn't See

As I was in a Blackness so black

Trying to keep my pants clean of crap

And I came upon a tarmac Road

Right Let's See Where This Goes

And so I Go on Ahead

Walking Through a Night That Feels...actually Not Dead

Or maybe kind of cause there was Fear

But In The Deep Silence I did Hear

The Spirit of Adventure Is Near

And on I Walked In a manner somewhat solemn

And Trusting there would be no wee gollum

And if there was I could take Him down

Or Turn Around back Into town

Go to bed and curl up like a ball nice and Round

But no that's Enough

I'm just Going to go and Be tough

And This Mountain I shall Climb

And ignore that little leggly Sign

And so I came to the place

That said yep, the mountain This Way

And I walked Into a Clearing

As some growly Shapes were Appearing 

And RUUUUUUUUUUN!!!

Cause Now there's a pack of dogs at my bum!

And I ran in the manner of someone Being chased by dogs

Almost Burning holes In my socks

And I stopped and looked back to See 

It Appears I had managed to safely flee

Yes but I wanted to Go Up the mountain

I don't care if they start growlin'

Who dae they think they are!

This wouldn't happen to those privileged with a car

So back Again I goes

But Something In Me Knows

To start Preparing my toes

For another fleeing 

After This One Who appears to be seething

Has had her stubborness Fulfilled

And so again I ran Praying not to be killed

But...but The Sign said the mountain is Here

I don't think these dogs can See Clear

I Am a tourist out for a hike

Not something You can just Decide to bite

So I gave it One last Go

This Time creeping up Slow

But they barked as One big Demon hound

And I coolly turned around

Okay You've Had Your Fun

At least This Time I Shan't Run

And so away I walked, indignant but Relieved

Cause wanting to climb the mountain was just a Thought I Believed

And wasn't actually True You See

I suppose that's What my leg had said with It's Ache

Don't go up there or you'll get in a scrape

And so I Happily Wandered Down

Understanding a bit more leg speak Now

And I spent the rest of The Night in the hostel Garden

Saying to my leg beg your pardon

And though with cold my Body did Harden

I couldn't Pull my Self away from The Stars

Perhaps I didn't want to interrupt their Conversation with My Heart

Maybe there were Healing Energies Being Sent

And I Felt like there were Many things to Mend

That would take me Years to even Comprehend 

Sometimes We don't Learn things All In One go

It Seeps In somehow and over time It Grows

There is One thing I was Clear on though

I had Learned a Big Lesson

I'm really more of a cat person